


Primum non Nocere

by Broken_Clover



Category: Guilty Gear
Genre: Floating Timeline, Gen, Intergenerational friendship, Mild Blood, Reconciliation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-16 03:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28575426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Broken_Clover/pseuds/Broken_Clover
Summary: Following a magic accident, Zappa finds himself embroiled in a conflict between the escaped serial killer Dr. Baldhead and the kindly but mysterious Dr. Jian, who is trying to hunt him down and stop him before he can take more innocent lives.
Kudos: 8





	1. Him

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Chibimun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chibimun/gifts).



> First gg fic of the new year! Hopefully it'll be a good one! This has been a WIP for a while so it's nice to see it come to fruition

The air was fuzzy, the trees were exploding, and the sky was a taunting blue below, perfect for dipping feet in on a hot summer’s day to cool off.

Or...no, that wasn’t right, was it? The grass was on his left and the sky was on his right? Maybe? No, now it was above him, both of them...everything was spinning...

“Ohhhh...my head…”

Hold it, hold it, hold it. Take it slow and easy. What could he remember offhand? A massive burst of light, a lot of heat all at once, then darkness.

Ah, yes. That was right. His name was Zappa, all his limbs were still attached, and the trees were _not_ on fire.

He tried to sit up, gingerly rubbing at the sore spot on his head. It didn’t come away wet, just from a glance it seemed like he’d gotten a hard knock on it rather than a real wound. Hopefully it meant it’d bruise over and be miserable for a few days, but he didn’t have to worry about keeling over in a puddle of his own blood.

Blood? Why did that remind him of something...he couldn’t remember.

Maybe he shouldn’t have been getting distracted anyway, wasn’t that a sign of a concussion? At the very least, he should probably be more worried about making sure he wasn’t going to be mauled by some wild animal. He was in the woods after all...erm, probably. Yeah, there were a lot of trees nearby, and he could feel his fingers digging into grass as he tried to get his bearings. But no animals, no buildings, either. And no other humans to be found, though there was an oddly shaped lump-

_“Doctor Faust??”_

It all came flooding back to him. Zappa recalled an unassuming beginning to another magic lesson with the man, settling in a quiet little alcove in the woods to avoid any trouble with people or causing much of a commotion. Remote as it was, neither of them had exactly been expecting a Gear to show up, either, so they hadn’t been entirely prepared to have something large and angry and fire-breathing barge in right in the middle of a teleportation spell. After that...he really couldn’t remember. There were just snippets of thought. The creature’s fangs flashing, his own feet scrambling under him, smears of green, someone screaming...

He shook his head. He had to make sure Faust was alright first, then he could worry about all the details later.

“Dr. Faust?” With some exertion to counteract the spinning, Zappa managed to stumble over to the man and put a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t look badly injured, aside from a minor scratch or two, but whatever had happened had knocked him completely unconscious. It took Zappa a moment to figure out what felt so odd about that assessment, until he realized the man was missing his characteristic paper-bag hat. He couldn’t remember seeing him without it before. After glancing around, he found the rumpled thing off the grass. There was something odd about witnessing the two things being separate for the first time. Had he always been bald? And how did he manage to see through the bag’s hole and glasses at the same time..?

No, no, he was getting off track again. He tucked the bag under his arm and rolled the man onto his back to double-check for injuries before carefully shaking him.

“Doctor? Dr. Faust?” Zappa asked. “Can you hear me? Are you okay?”

“Mhh….”

“Ah- !” He sat back to give the man space as he began to rouse. “I was worried! Are you hurt?”

“Mgghm...y’r...vocal chords...tuning…” Faust mumbled incoherently, putting a hand to his head as he sat up. “Dr. Wu to OR 4…”

“Um, doctor Faust?” He wasn’t sure if he should be concerned. Zappa just tried to give him space. But this was Faust, he was always okay, wasn't he?

The man’s eyes blinked out of synch for a moment, but then he seemed to come to his senses. “Eh? So much color, how did I…?”

Or...maybe not. Zappa was starting to think they both probably needed to find the nearest path out, preferably into the nearest hospital.

He stood up, trying to pull the man along with him. Though with his extreme height, even when he was standing Faust was still nearly as tall as he was. 

“Come on, I think I remember how we got in here, we should be fine- eep!”

Out of nowhere, he felt a tight grip on his arm. Obviously it was his companion’s, but it still was a nasty shock, not helped by the fact that he followed that with another unnerving behavior, seemingly ignoring all laws of physics and human joints to...well, ‘slide’ seemed like the best word, but it was more like the invisible strings tied to his limbs had gone taut, as though an equally-invisible puppeteer was getting ready for another performance.

“Oh hello there, little boy!” He said, mouth suddenly stretching into a face-splitting grin

Zappa stumbled backwards in shock, landing on the ground hard as the man loomed over him. “D-doctor Faust? Are you okay?”

“Mmm?” His head tilted quizzically. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about! Do you have a head injury? Let me take a look!”

Something about how he said that made Zappa feel uneasy. He knew Faust was a genius, and this was clearly him, so it shouldn’t have unsettled him. But his grin felt very un-faust-like, in a way he couldn’t name. And why had he said that?

He tried to dust himself off and stand up. “I’m fine, really. Just a little dazed, but I’ve had a lot worse. No need to worry about me.”

“ _Non_ -sense!” The man replied, again oddly uncomfortably from the way he exaggerated the word. “I’m a doctor, you know!”

“I...do know that, yes.”

“Goooood! So you know you’re in good hands!”

Zappa managed an uneasy laugh. “Uh, I suppose you’re right. I guess my nerves are still just a little frazzled. Oh, here, you dropped your bag.” He offered the man his slightly-crumpled brown paper bag. “I think it got knocked off, I know you probably want to put it back on your head-”

“Paper bag? Oh, no no no no!” The man not-so-gently smacked the object out of his hands. “What a silly thing to do! Why, if I covered up my face, nobody would be able to see me smiiiiile~!” Fingers hooked into his mouth, pulling his lips taut to the point where Zappa winced just at the sight of it. “And what’s life without a smile?”

If he wasn’t unnerved before, he definitely was now. Had Faust hit his head? What the heck was going on?

Regardless, the discomfort was quickly turning to panic. He wasn’t sure why, but he didn’t feel especially safe where he was. 

Zappa tried and failed to smile, raising his hands in submission as he attempted to scoot back. “Um, sure, sure. Whatever you say doc- _ow!”_

The tall man immediately jerked toward him, like a bloodhound on a trail. Zappa didn’t really notice, too busy cradling his hand in his lap as it pulsed with pain.

“Gah...when did I bang this?” He hissed through gritted teeth, trying not to twist it around too much as he looked the injury over. “Damn it, is it my wrist? Did I hit it when I fell over?”

“Is that an injury I spy?” Faust asked, in that weird sing-songy voice. “Let me seeeee~”

In any other circumstance, Zappa would have let the man go to work and do what he did best. But right now he didn’t want to even be near the guy, let alone have him poke and prod. He wasn’t good at coming up with plans on the fly, so the best he could manage was trying to downplay it.

“It- it’s fine, really. It was just a twinge. I’m fine now.” His blatant lying wasn’t helped by the fact that he couldn’t move to stand up without jostling it again, making him wince and jerk back. Faust watched him all the while, that ominous expression slowly morphing into something that almost looked… _hungry._

Zappa desperately tried to talk his way out of the situation. “L-look, let’s just go back into town, okay? You can even go on ahead, I’ll catch up in a- !”

The man crossed his arms and shook his head, but his grin didn’t fade. “What an absurd idea! I can’t possibly just _leave_ when there’s a patient right in front of me who needs help!”

“D-do- doctor Faust, you r-really don’t need to- !”

He felt the wind be knocked from his lungs as Faust made the decision for him. For as spindly as the man was, he still felt surprisingly heavy as he straddled his waist and pinned him to the grass. Before he could react to that, skinny fingers had a tight grip on his injured arm.

“Doc- doctor F- what are you doing?!”

“My job, silly boy! Now hold still!” He wasn’t especially gentle as he jerked the limb around. “Well, of _course_ I can’t see the problem, all this skin and bone is in the way! I won’t be able to do much of anything until I remove the obstructions! Hehehe! But don’t worry, I can fix it for you! Just hold still for me a moment, won’t you- ?”

By that point, Zappa had no issue screaming and trying to kick the man off, but his larger size and the odd angle they were at made it impossible to accomplish much. He was going to die, he was going to die, he was _absolutely going to die_ and he still had no idea what the hell was going on or why the man had suddenly gotten so deranged.

Through the panic, he noticed that the tall man seemed halted in place, still holding on tightly but not making good on any of his promises of dissection. Every second only made it clearer to him that somehow, everything had just...stopped.

Until the man jerked again, sending Zappa back into a panic, though there was still nothing actually harming him. Yet.

“Ahh, where is my dear Margherita?” The man felt along his coat in a way that would have been comical, if not for everything else currently happening. “How can a doctor do his work without any tools?”

Without much fanfare, he stood back up, leaving Zappa behind in confused shock. With his back hunched and feet dragging along the ground, it looked like some sort of demon was scuttling around, prying apart bushes and foliage.

It was a completely miraculous opportunity, but Zappa wasn’t going to waste it. It was hard to be fast and quiet at the same time, but he managed to bite down on his lip as he rolled over on his bad arm and got his feet underneath him. The brush around him was thick, full of things he could hide behind. He took refuge behind the first bush that looked big enough to hide him, kneeling down and praying he hadn’t been spotted in his getaway.

“There she is, my sweet little-” He could hear the voice on the other side, slightly muffled. “Hmm? Where did you goooo little one, it’s not good to hide from a doctor, you know! It’ll just be a little pinch, hehehe!”

Footsteps shuffled about aimlessly. Zappa wasn’t sure if the man was getting close to his hiding spot, but he tried to put more distance in between them by scooting over to the next hiding space. If he was quiet, if he was careful, then maybe he would be able to escape and run back to the nearest town. It would be okay if there were more people, but the idea of being stuck so far out without anyone else, stuck with someone he wasn't even sure he knew, was terrifying, and he could swear his heart was going to-

A hand clapped over his mouth, stifling the scream that attempted to make its way out as soon as he felt it.

 _“Shh.”_ a strange voice whispered in his ear. _“Keep your head down.”_

Zappa was terrified, but he was too frightened to disobey. With what little movement he had, he craned his neck down to hide. On the other side, the distant footsteps veered uncomfortably close, paced, back and forth, and moved off in a different direction.

“Ahehehehe! Hmm…” The man’s tone suddenly sounded very confused. “What am I doing all the way out here? I can’t be a doctor if there’s no patients to treat!”

The footsteps suddenly turned into something more like scuttling. The noise was unnerving, but it was moving away from him quickly, and it wasn’t long before he couldn’t even hear it anymore.

It took a few more moments before the hand over his mouth pulled away. Zappa immediately threw himself in the opposite direction, grunting from the way he landed on his arm. The other figure loomed over him, silhouetted by the light into something gaunt and terrifying.

“S-stop!” He cried, throwing his hands up. “Don’t hurt me!”

“Hurt you…?” Then to his surprise, the man’s expression shifted into worry. “Oh! Oh, no, you’re injured!”

He knelt on the ground by Zappa’s side, gingerly looking over his injured arm. “How awful...don’t worry. Dr. Jian will make it better.”

“D- doctor- what?” He was feeling dizzy again. Maybe fainting was a good idea after all.

The maybe-doctor seemed to be taking the situation much more in stride, calmly muttering a few lines of an incantation under his breath. “Shh. It’s alright. I’m a doctor, and a very good one. Let me see it.”

He didn’t exactly have the energy to resist, or enough coherent thoughts to really think straight. All he could hope was that he wasn’t going to be gutted by the second deranged stranger he’d managed to bump into on the same day.

Zappa felt an odd coolness settle over his throbbing wrist, and the pain lightened with it. He still winced when a set of long fingers fanned over it, but it hurt far less the second time.

“There we are...just let it cool down.” The man nodded in approval. “It just looks like you sprained your wrist. That’s good, nothing broken. Did you fall down?”

“I think- I think so.” Honestly, Zappa was amazed he could remember anything coherently. At this point, he was half convinced this was some surreal dream. “Who...who exactly are you?”

“Dr. Jian, at your service, ahehe!” He gave a cartoonish bow, letting his lab coat flourish. “Always happy to lend a hand to those in need.”

So he really was another doctor, then. Not the one he wanted, but it was still better than getting mauled. “Where the heck did you come from? Not that I’m not grateful for your timing, but I wasn’t expecting to see anyone else around here.”

“Ah! I am a traveling doctor, I go near and far and everywhere in-between! But I’m glad I was in the right place at the right time.”

Zappa cautiously peered out from behind the bushes. “Is that guy really gone? He showed up out of nowhere and ran off just as fast, but...huh?”

Once he was sure the coast was clear, he wandered back out. The scary man was gone, but he still couldn’t see Faust anywhere. “Doctor Faust?” He pushed aside branches and bushes to try and catch a glance of him, but had no such luck. “Doctor Faust? Where are you?!”

“What’s going on? What are you shouting at?”

“Ah…” He turned back to face Jian. “Do you think you can help me?”

“Always! Dr. Jian can always make things better! What can I do for you?”

“I’m looking for someone- another doctor, actually. I think I passed out, so I don’t know where he could have gone. But- but you were around, maybe you saw him? He’s very tall, and skinny, and he wears a paper bag? I thought that crazy guy was him for a minute, but he’s nothing like Faust.”

“Another doctor?” He thought for a moment, before shaking his head. “I’m sorry, but I only happened by when I heard someone screaming. I just showed up to all this, and I haven’t seen anyone aside from you and that man. Any good doctor worth their salt wouldn’t leave an injured person behind, but at this point we need to consider all options. Can you think of anywhere he may have gone?”

“I’m not sure where Doctor Faust would have vanished to…” He perked up in realization. “Maybe that man kidnapped him! You’re right, he wouldn’t have just left, so something bad must have happened to him!”

Jian’s hands tangled together. “Um. Yes, of course, that must be it.”

“I have to go help him!”

“Woah, woah, woah, slow down for a moment, kiddo.” Jian grabbed him by the collar of his shirt before he could get very far. “You can’t just go rushing off after him!”

After a moment of being strangled, Zappa rubbed at his throat and looked over his shoulder. “Huh? Why not?”

The man hesitated. “Tell me...Zappa, was it? Are you familiar with a man who goes by ‘Dr. Baldhead?’”

“Bald...head?” He thought aloud. “He’s...some kind of criminal, isn’t he? I think I remember my mother talking about it when I was little, but I thought he was taken into custody and put in a dimensional prison? I grew up in Australia, but I remember when he got caught they put it in the newspaper.”

Jian gave a weary sigh. “It’s...that’s a little complicated. He’s a former doctor that became a serial killer. For several years, he went on a murder spree and hurt countless people before they were able to hunt him down.”

“A-A _serial killer?”_ Zappa felt a shudder run up his spine. Then he could only imagine what could have happened to him if Jian hadn't intervened. 

“Yes. The important part is that he’s free from prison, and if I don't find him soon, I can only imagine the sort of harm that- he’d cause.”

Despite his unease, Zappa started to trot after him. “I’ll come with you, then. It sounds like you could use the extra manpower.”

“WHAT?! Are you absolutely mad?!” The man was aghast. “Baldhead is dangerous! I’d never want to put a poor little thing like you in harm’s way!”

He understood the sentiment, but something about the way he phrased it irked him. “I get it. But I _want_ to help. Please.”

“I...alright.” Jian eventually relented, shaking his head in dismay. “If you’re so insistent. Let’s not waste anymore time. Follow me.”


	2. Me

“How is your arm?”

Zappa took a step to the side as a large hand reached out towards him. “You asked me a few minutes ago, I’m fine.”

Jian looked him over for a moment, before resuming his stride. “I’m sorry. I’m prone to being a worrier. Just part of the job, you know?”

“Yeah, I get it.” It was starting to get a little annoying, but he could understand. “Are you sure this is the right direction?”

“This is absolutely the direction he’s headed in. I know this isn’t a beaten path, but when it comes to Baldhead we need to be as fast and efficient as possible. I can’t understate how much of a danger he is if he’s loose. But yes, I’m positive this is the way.”

Zappa wasn’t entirely sure how he knew, but Jian seemed insistent. Not like he had a better idea, though. “So where do you think he’s headed, anyway?”

“Knowing him, he’s going to go after the first people he can find. Baldhead is distractible.” He replied. “That’s why he gave up hunting you, but as long as he knows where someone is, he can’t be stopped. He’s like an animal. He can’t be reasoned with. He’s god-damn deranged, and he thinks that everything he does is to help people. He cuts people open and pulls them apart piece by piece, but he thinks what he’s doing is curing them. I once knew a man that he met who had cataracts, so in his warped mind, he though the best way to cure his condition was to stab his eyes out with a scalpel.”

Jian wasn’t exactly cautious with the gory details, and Zappa felt his stomach lurch. He must have made it obvious, as Jian immediately paused to look him over with worry.

“Are you alright? You look pale.”

“I’m- I’m fine.” He replied, taking a breath to calm himself down. “You seem to know a lot about this guy.”

“We...go a long way back. He’s an old associate, of sorts. We aren’t close anymore. Obviously.”

“Obviously.” Zappa tried to laugh, but it came out as a nervous titter. “I mean, you at least look like a doctor that knows what he’s doing.”

Jian perked up and puffed out his chest. “Of course I know what I’m doing! I’m one of the world’s best surgeons!”

At least that got the man talking about something other than murder, or pestering him about his arm. It didn’t take much prompting for Jian to launch into what was more or less his life story, how he’d been some medical prodigy who immediately shot to stardom due to his natural aptitude for surgery.

“It sounds like you really were impressive.” Zappa managed to say, after several attempts made to interrupt Jian’s winding monologue. “How come I never heard about you before?”

“Oh, I’m sure you have!” Jian replied. “Doctors may not be as newsworthy as celebrity gossip, but I was truly one-of-a-kind! You look almost old enough to be in high school, surely you must have heard at least once about my pioneering techniques in magic-based surgery?”

“...I’m _twenty_ , and no.” So far, this was the one thing about Jian that he was incredibly frustrated by. Accomplished as he was, he certainly didn’t downplay it to any degree or show any humbleness about it. Maybe that would have been less aggravating if he didn’t simultaneously treat him like a hapless child. Zappa was certainly aware he wasn’t in his element, and that he could be quick to panic, but he felt there was still a difference between being helpful and being patronizing. “Okay, so about Baldhead-”

“I still can’t believe you’ve never heard of me!” Jian interrupted, sounding positively aghast at the concept. “Well, you’ve probably just forgotten. Anyway, as I was saying-”

Jian went back to talking about himself, to Zappa’s consternation. Weren’t they supposed to be looking out for a serial killer? How did the man seem more concerned with his own achievements than the fact that people could be in danger?

“Jian, I have a question-”

 _“Doctor_ Jian, never forget the ‘doctor!’” He said. “Sorry, what do you need? Did you need me to explain some of the terminology? I don’t mind at all! I love talking about medicine! And I can absolutely understand how someone like you would have issues-”

“‘Someone like me?’” Zappa replied, with a tinge of anger. He understood what Jian was _trying_ to say, that technical jargon would be difficult for a layman unfamiliar with the field. But something about the man’s tone was still horribly condescending, even moreso from the fact that Jian seemed more concerned with flaunting his knowledge and prowess as opposed to why they were even there in the first place.

Jian recoiled. “I- I’m sorry, did I do something wrong? I can try and explain it another way-”

“No, you’re not getting-”

“I’m sure I can do a better job!” He said, starting to ramble again. “I can start all over, I can explain in more detail-”

“That’s not what I-”

“S-something different, then? I can do that! I c- can do that, of course! I can always-”

“Will you just _listen to me-”_

“B-be- because I’m a _very_ good doctor, you know, I- really am-”

Zappa felt his anger reach a boiling point. “If you’re so amazing, why are you wandering around in the middle of nowhere instead of an actual hospital?!”

The man’s incoherent babbling died down. Zappa was grateful for the quiet, but felt a pang of regret in hindsight. “I…I’m sorry, doctor, that wasn’t right of me, I shouldn’t have…”

He faltered, at first out of embarrassment, but soon enough he found cold unease pooling in his stomach as he looked back up to Jian’s face. Something about his expression was just… _off_ , in a way he didn’t have a word for. The eerie glint of the man’s glasses sent a chill down his spine, despite the warm sunshine. Jian’s expression was unreadable, but the hand on his coat tightened into a white-knuckled grip.

“I really- I really am a good doctor, you know.” Jian said, in a quiet, fragile little voice.

This was retreading a path that Zappa definitely didn’t want to go down again. He tried to think of what to say to calm him down. “I- I’m sure you are.”

It didn’t work. Jian’s blank-eyed face swiveled to look down at him, rapidly shifting back and forth between different expressions. “Don’t look at me like that. Why are you looking at me like that?”

Zappa took a nervous step away. “S-stay back-”

“Don’t- don’t look at me like that.” Jian took a lurching step forward, not realizing how much more terrifying it made him look. “I can fix it, whatever it is, I can fix it, so you don’t need to look at me like that, okay?”

What the hell had gotten into him?! Jian had seemed so friendly, why was he being just as creepy as Baldhead now?

He tried to glance over his shoulder as he backed away, to avoid tripping over his own feet again and putting himself in another helpless situation. All the while, Jian staggered towards him, looking far less maniacal than Baldhead had, but still equally off-putting.

“Don’t go away.” Jian said, sounding just as much a plea as it did a warning. “Don’t go away. I can fix it. I’ll make it all better, I promise. You don’t have to- “

The tension was suddenly interrupted. Zappa sniffed at the air.

“Is something...burning?”

Jian’s eyes snapped open, and he bolted off into the woods.

“Wh- doctor, wait!” Zappa ran off after him almost immediately. At first, he’d thought the man was running out of embarrassment or shame, but he realized as he tailed the man’s tall figure that the smell of smoke was growing stronger the further they went. Jian was headed towards the smell, but why?

Eventually, the answer came to him. The thick woods opened into a clearing full of camping tents, all of which were ablaze. Jian was staring at the scene in horror, mouth slack in disbelief.

“Oh- oh no, no, no-”

Zappa was terrified too, but he tried to force himself not to freeze. There wasn’t much water in a nearby bucket, but he still picked it up and dumped it out on one of the burning tents. He was impressed by his own confidence, though it immediately vanished as soon as he realized he was all out of water. He began to panic, grabbing an abandoned bedroll and using it to beat at the fire.

A spindly shadow moved in his peripheral vision- _Baldhead?_ Was this some messed-up trap?

“Watch your head!”

Zappa managed to duck just in time for something large and metal to go sailing overhead. As soon as he realized that it was some sort of hatch door, it burst open, releasing an impossible flood of water that swamped the campsite. The force of it pushed the tents over, and anything not tacked down was washed past. The water didn’t lessen until the door was slammed shut again and dissipated in a puff of magic, leaving the remainder to soak into the dirt and turn the remains of the campsite into a marshy mess of mud and tent pieces.

It took all his willpower to not collapse into the mess out of sheer relief. Zappa managed to release the death grip he had on the bucket to drop it, and turned around on wobbly knees to face his companion.

“God, that was terrifying. Thank you for that, doctor, I-”

Jian looked utterly mortified, still vacantly staring at the destroyed site.

“What have I done…?” He asked, with a small voice that barely escaped his mouth.

Zappa tilted his head. “Doctor Jian? What’s wrong?”

“This is all my fault, this is all my fault, this is-”

Before Zappa could stop him, Jian ran off into the woods again.

“Doctor!” He shouted after him. “Where are you going?!”

He was moments away from running after him once more, but another little voice caught his attention.

“...Is he gone…?”

“Huh?” He turned back around. “Is anyone there?”

He was startled by the sight of a small group approaching, pushing past plants to make their way back into the clearing. All of them glanced around nervously, as if in search, with some of them wearing singed clothing.

“Are these- uh, _were_ these your tents?” He asked, gesturing the mess. “I’m sorry, I think he overdid it with the water.”

“It- it’s okay, we can replace a few tents.” One woman said, shaken but relieved. “We’re just glad that absolute madman is finally gone.”

A chill seeped into his bones. “A ‘madman?’ Was he the one who set your tents on fire?”

“I don’t think he _meant_ to do that, but, well...the guy just showed up out of nowhere! Started swinging some giant knife around, rambling about how we were all late for our checkups.”

“I just went last week!” One of them interjected.

“He was just ranting and raving, but none of us could understand a thing he said. At one point while he was running around, I think he managed to kick over one of our lanterns, and it hit a tent.”

Zappa tried to look them over. “Are any of you hurt?”

“I think I twisted an ankle trying to run away, and Ellie scraped up her arms when she fell over, but aside from that it was mostly just a nasty shock.” She shook her head. “Still, definitely appreciate the help. I can’t imagine how bad that could have gotten if it didn’t get put out.”

“Glad I could help!” He smiled back. “It wasn’t just me, though, I had some help-” His eyes snapped open. “Oh, no, doctor Jian! I- I’ll be back in a minute, sorry- !”

Zappa hoped he was guessing the right direction Jian had run off to. The reason behind it still eluded him, but the important part was just finding him at all- though, he realized very quickly, the man’s size didn’t do him any favors, and he ended up being easy to spot as his head poked out.

“Doctor Jian…?” He asked, approaching slowly and cautiously. The man had been erratic, and he didn’t want to get into any more hazardous situations.

Jian turned to him, just enough to catch a glimpse of his face.

“Ah- ahehe,” he croaked out, mouth quirking into a sad little smile, “I guess I’m not all that good at hiding?”

Zappa took the risk and moved even closer, noticing the log the man sat on and finding a spot on the other side to sit down. “Why did you run away?”

He didn’t respond, instead drawing his knees into his chest and wrapping his arms around them.

“Doctor Jian?”

“I can’t do this. I can’t go after Baldhead.”

“What do you mean?” Asked Zappa. “We still need to track him down! We still need to find out what he did to Doctor Faust!”

Jian gave a shuddery sigh. “Baldhead hasn’t done anything to Faust.”

“What?” He asked, skeptic. “How can you be sure?”

“Because that man _is_ Doctor Faust.”

Zappa wasn’t sure if he’d misheard him. Was Jian actually making no sense, or had he managed to get a concussion and it just _sounded_ like nonsense? “What?”

“He’s...well, he’s only half of him, actually.”

So he hadn’t misheard him, but it still didn’t make it much clearer. “‘Half of Faust?’ What do you mean? Where’s the other half, then?” He demanded, only for it to come to him a moment later. Slowly, he looked up at his companion in realization. “Oh…”

“Yes. Together, Baldhead and I make the man you know as ‘Faust.’ I don’t know how exactly, but the interference of two teleportation spells folding into each other managed to split us apart into two separate entities.”

“So that’s what you mean by ‘half’...” Zappa tilted his head. “But if there’s a Baldhead half and a Jian half, why isn’t there a Faust half, too?”

“Because then it would be a third?” Jian gave a very unconvincing smile, but it dropped just as quickly. “Who I- who Faust is now, that’s made up of the two of us together. I’m always pushing so hard to keep Baldhead locked up, so nobody can ever see him, and he can never hurt anyone else. I’ve tried _so hard_ to keep him from running amok, but I never thought this would happen. Which is why we need to find him and stop him before he can cause any more harm.”

“And you’ve always been like that? Separated?”

“Yes. Well- no, not ‘always.’ We didn’t used to be separate. There was a time when Baldhead and I were a whole piece working in tandem. But there was a time when we diverged, and that was the first time Baldhead went on a rampage.”

“So it makes sense, then.” Said Zappa, with another spark of realization. “Why you were so sure where he was going? You'd know him better than anyone.”

“Not...not exactly.” Jian suddenly looked nervous.

“What do you mean?”

“That accidental singularity, the one that split me. That sort of thing just doesn’t follow the laws of reality.” The doctor explained. “And, well, usually I have an easy time skirting that with my magic, but this is something else entirely. One person just can’t be two people simultaneously. I can sense exactly where Baldhead is, because that’s where _I’m_ supposed to be, too.”

“Well, that- that’s good, isn’t it? So you know where he is?” His companion asked. But it didn’t sound good. Why did Jian still look so uneasy?

“It’s not that simple. Like I said, the fundamental nature of reality doesn’t want me and Baldhead to exist separately. I feel just as repelled from his presence as I do drawn in. Something within me is starting to unravel and fade. I know Baldhead is starting to feel it, too. And I fear if we don’t get this situation sorted out, we’ll both be deleted out of existence. An anomaly like me just can’t exist.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Wh- I’m finally going to get rid of him! I’m going to put an end to this nightmare! Did you miss the part where the man is a deranged serial killer?!

“Oh.” Zappa said simply. “Why?”

 _“Why?!”_ Jian looked at him like he’d just asked the man to shoot his dog. “Have you been following anything I’ve said?!”

He flinched at the harsh noise. “I- I mean, he couldn’t have always been like that, right?” He asked. “I mean, wishful thinking, but if you two got along so well, or you were the same person, or-” A hand rubbed at his temples. “Dammit, this is really hard to follow. I guess, you two used to cooperate, something must have happened, right? Why did you stop getting along?”

The man went quiet again, gazing up at the river that rushed by a few feet ahead of them. Jian pulled a familiar long scalpel from his coat and, noiselessly, used the blunt end to scratch at the dirt. Shaking hands painted a childlike portrait of a long-haired girl, smiling up at him.

“My greatest failure.” He said, staring at the picture wistfully as he clung to his scalpel.

Zappa looked between the man and his drawing. “Can I ask what happened?”

He sighed. “It was just supposed to be a routine surgery. That’s all it was. And she was so nervous when she came to the hospital, she was just so afraid without her mommy and daddy. I always got along so well with the children’s ward, I- I loved playing with the kids, finding ways to make them smile, to get them to laugh, to make them feel better while they were injured and sick. And she loved it when I came to visit her, she was so happy when I’d read her a book or tell her my jokes. She’d laugh, and she’d call me ‘Doctor Baldhead’ because I was the only person she knew that didn’t have hair, and I’d laugh too, because, well, wasn’t that just the funniest thing you’d ever heard? And I told her, I told her- ‘you don’t have to be afraid, we’ll all take care of you. It won’t hurt at all, it’ll just be a little nap, then you’ll wake up and you can see your mommy and daddy, they’ll come take you back home and then you can eat all the popsicles you want.”

Jian put his face in his hands. “She was six.” He sniffled. “She was six years old, and I killed her.”

The two went quiet for a while. Zappa scooted down the log, closer to the man. Eventually, he reached out to put a hand on his knee. 

“So, you did it on purpose?”

“Wh- huh?”

“The girl. You killed her on purpose?”

Jian lifted his head back up. “Of course I didn’t! How can you say something like that?!”

He flinched, but still managed to shrug. “I mean, that’s what you seem to think.”

“I didn’t kill her!” Jian protested, utterly mortified, with more tears pricking his eyes. “I did everything right! I did everything-”

“-you did everything perfectly, which means it was an accident.” Zappa replied. “I mean, I’m not a doctor, but it sounds like you did everything you possibly could. Sometimes stuff just...happens, even when we try our best. Accidents happen.”

“But- but not to me! Accidents aren’t supposed to happen to me! Not when people trust me to take care of them! I have to be perfect!”

“You _can’t,_ though. You just can’t. Your best is, heh-” he paused. “You just do your best. And stuff still happens, and it’s awful, but you do all you can. It's ok to feel sad that it happened, but that doesn't mean you didn't do your best. And I mean, even if you couldn’t help that girl back then, you can still help people now, can’t you? I know those people back at the campsite-”

“Wait.” Jian cut him off. “What people?”

“The ones the tents belonged to. I think one of them twisted an ankle, maybe you could take a look at them?”

The man hunched over, clutching at his chest. Zappa jerked back in panic, but Jian let out a hard sigh of relief.

“I thought...I thought they were dead. I thought that Baldhead-”

“No, no, they’re okay!” He assured him, arms raised in a placating gesture. “He scared them, but they’re all okay.”

“Thank the gods.” Jian pushed himself off the log, standing back up to his full height. “Well, I think you’re right, Zappa. If I don't try and help people, then I’m not really much of a doctor, am I?”

“I wouldn’t know, I’m not the doctor here.”

The man laughed weakly, reaching down to affectionately ruffle his hair. “Come along, then. Enough moping around. There’s patients to treat.”


	3. We

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh beans, this ended up taking longer than expected! I'm sorry about the wait. But I hope you enjoy! This has been something I've wanted to make for a very long time, and it's always fun to see these sort of things come to fruition!
> 
> And, I suppose, happy late, late, late, late birthday to Jim! This was supposed to be your birthday present, after all.

“Are you sure you’ll be able to manage yourselves?”

“We’ll be just fine.” The woman said with a warm smile, keeping most of her weight on the new makeshift crutch. “You two have already done more than enough.”

Jian returned with a polite nod. “Of course! It’s a doctor’s duty to make sure his patients are cared for. And...are you sure you don’t want us to walk you back to town…?”

“Doctor, it already sounded like they can handle it. Besides, shouldn’t we be getting going, ourselves?”

“Oh! Oh, yes, you’re right, Zappa.” He replied, bowing in apology. “Sorry, force of habit. Take care of yourselves!”

The two men set off back into the woods as the group waved goodbye. Jian stood upright and proud, but gradually, as they were surrounded by foliage again, his shoulders drooped and his posture slumped.

“Dr. Jian?” Zappa skidded to a stop. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I’m- everything’s fine now.” The man said, delicately putting a hand on his own chest. “I wasn’t expecting that to make me so...nervous.”

“Nervous? Oh, you mean when we first arrived?”

“No, no. When we were treating their injuries.” Jian took note of the other’s shocked look, and chuckled to himself. “I know, it sounds strange, doesn’t it?”

“You’re joking right? You’re- you’re pulling my leg?”

Jian shook his head. “No, nothing of the sort. I have countless hours of experience, and I know virtually every procedure by heart, but,” he paused. “But I just can’t shake that little twinge of nerves in the back of my head, the thought of all the ways a procedure could go wrong and how _easy_ it would be to do more damage and make everything worse. I haven’t been able to escape it since…”

“Since the accident?”

He gave a short, jerky nod. “That’s just it. I know I’ve done these procedures before, and I’ve done them perfectly fine. But, I keep thinking to myself, ‘what if I don’t?’ I still love being a doctor, I love being able to help people, but I feel like I have too many nerves, and they’ve started to outnumber my enthusiasm. I would be a better doctor if I wasn’t constantly afraid of making those mistakes, but I haven’t been able to figure out how to _not.”_

Zappa offered back a dry little laugh. “I definitely understand _that_ feeling, it reminds me of being back in college.”

“Oh?” Jian perked up. “You’re a med student?”

“Erm, well, not really. I’m a Gen Ed still, I’m not really sure what I want to do with my life yet. I’ve- I’ve taken an anatomy class, and since me and my mother live out in the farmlands, she taught me some first-aid and field medicine since the nearest hospital was a good ways down the road to the city.”

“I see, that makes sense.” The doctor nodded. “You were definitely impressive in setting that sling, I suppose I shouldn’t be terribly surprised!”

“Wh- really? You think so? I mean, it was just tying fabric, nothing elaborate. Nowhere near a _real_ doctor.” Despite his words, Zappa was still blushing and trying to hide in his collar.

“Well, I think you’d make a good doctor.”

“Oh, thank you, I...I suppose that’s high praise, coming from you.”

“It’s just me saying what I think is true.” Jian replied with a smile. “Besides, I know your aptitude for healing magic, you’ve improved quite a bit over the last few months.” 

“...How did you-”

“I’m part of Faust, remember? I was there for all your lessons, in a way. I’ve seen your skills grow, you really are a natural.”

The man could feel himself reddening further. “W-well, mother always told me there’s no such thing as talent, just hard work. Not sure if I believe that, but time and effort’s the best way to get better at something, I think.”

Jian went quiet for a moment. “I see. She sounds like a clever woman.”

They traveled in silence a while longer. All through it, Zappa could feel the cogs in his head spinning around, trying to think of some sort of plan. Jian hadn’t exactly mentioned much in terms of what they were going to do when they actually _found_ Baldhead. He sounded confident enough, but he didn’t know how far confidence could carry them.

“Dr. Jian?”

“Yes?”

“So, I was thinking about Baldhead?” He tried to think of the words he wanted. “Do you think...since he’s Faust, too, does that mean he knows me?”

Jian hesitated. “I can’t say for sure. We share the same memories, but his perception is warped. Why do you ask?”

“I’m- I’m just thinking, what if I used that as an advantage? What if I used myself as bait?”

The man all but flew back, landing on his feet but looking no less stable. “What?!”

Zappa knew it wasn’t the best idea, but he tried to be firm. “You said I could help!”

“You did! You were very helpful, but this isn’t something you need to be involved in. You know I’d never want to put you in harm’s way, so how can you expect me to say anything but no?”

“You said you’ve seen my magic! You know I can make defensive spells!”

“I said no!” Jian shouted back. “You can’t just throw yourself into the line of fire like that! I won’t allow- ah…”

His frustration suddenly became panic, then nothing at all. Before Zappa could react, the man’s legs crumpled underneath him, and he hit the ground with a low, heavy thud.

“Doctor?!”

He knelt down by his side, trying to find a way to help. But as soon as he so much as grazed an arm, he watched Jian… _flicker,_ for lack of a better word, like radio static from a distant channel, with his frame blurring around the edges and smudging. It was only momentary, but it must have been grueling, as Jian’s limp frame shuddered, painfully, and propped itself up on trembling arms.

“I don’t…I don’t want anyone to sacrifice anything for me. _Ever.”_ Jian rasped, lenses askew. 

Zappa wasn’t sure how to feel. His hands ghosted over Jian, trying to decide if it was better to let him be or try to help him up.

“I didn’t want you to be involved...I didn’t want anyone else involved…”

“Then why did you let me come?”

“Because you were stubborn.” The trembling of his arms worsened, and for a moment he swore he went fuzzy again for a half-blink. Jian looked back towards the dirt. “And- and because I couldn’t say no. I was too much of a coward to actually solve my own problems. I took as long as I could wandering around on foot, in the hopes I’d find a way to talk you out of it. But I couldn’t think of anything. I didn’t _want_ to think of anything.”

After a moment of thought, Zappa sat down on the ground next to him. “What’s wrong with needing a little help from time to time?”

“I help people. Not the other way around.” Jian forced himself upright, though even sitting he still dwarfed his companion significantly. “Look what’s happened. How many people have almost died? You and those campers…”

“But we all came out okay, in the end.” Offered Zappa. “Nobody’s seriously hurt.”

“This is what happens.” The doctor continued on, as though nothing else had been said. “This is what I _do_ to people, everyone I touch and everyone I’m around, I ruin them. Even if I- even if I don’t _kill_ them, I still destroy everything. I’m a cancer. I’m a cancer that leaches into everything I’m close to.” His breath hitched in panic. “You can’t- you’ll never trust me again, will you? You’ll never think of me the way you used to. You can’t see me as a doctor, not a _real_ one, when half of me tried to kill you and the other falls apart like a child whenever anything goes wrong? Who am I?! What am I?! _I’m not Faust! I’m not anything!”_

“Doctor, please, stop.”

Jian complied, but it didn’t do away with his staccato breathing or trembling lip. Zappa wasn’t sure if he should give the man space or a leveled look in the eyes, so he found his focus flicking back and forth.

“That’s not true. And I think you _know_ it isn’t true.”

He didn’t get a response at first. The doctor drew his knees to his chest, and let his chin rest on them “Oh, look at me. Just look at me.” He whispered. “We just did this, didn’t we? You already talked me through this. Why are we here again? Aren’t I better than this?”

Zappa felt his shoulders sag. “You’re not gonna fix yourself in a day. You said you’ve been battling this a long time, right? And like I said earlier, I don’t think you’ll really learn or change yourself unless you try again and again and put in the effort. That’s why I keep trying to help. I know the way I was, the way I used to be...I’d be too much of a coward to help someone with something like this, even someone that I saw as a friend and mentor. So I’m trying to be better. But all that, all that trying and learning and changing...it’s better with someone to help you along, isn’t it?

And, if I can be a little harsh for a second,” he hesitated, “it doesn’t sound like handling it yourself has gone so well.”

Jian flinched, but he nodded. “No, you’re right, you’re right. It’s been so long, I suppose I forget things ever being any different.”

“How long have you been focused on this? Ever since it happened, is that all you’ve been able to think about?”

Jian shook his head. “No. No, I wouldn’t say so. I mean, it’s always been in the back of my mind, but…” He paused. “Think of it like...a sprained wrist. Using that hand hurts, but, it’s not _that_ bad, because you still have another hand to use. It hurts, and sometimes it hurts more than usual, but you’re still functional, even if it’s less than normal. On good days you forget the problem’s there.”

Zappa cocked his head to the side. “But it won’t heal right if you just leave it like that. That’s what mother told me when I sprained an ankle in middle school. You wrap it up and put ice on it because if you leave a sprain alone it heals up wrong, and then you’re stuck with part of you that doesn’t ever work right.” A thought occurred to him. “Wait, you said we’ve been wandering around the slow way. There’s a way we could have gotten to Baldhead faster?”

As he tried to look up, Jian refused to meet his gaze.

“Doctor?”

“It...wouldn’t have been a _perfect_ method, but I can still teleport. And...since I can sense where he is, I...could at least manage something vaguely accurate.”

He couldn’t help but feel a flood of frustration rush through his blood. “And you decided to go the long way?!”

“I told you, I told you I was trying to get you to go back home…”

The haunted look on the man’s face brought an odd sense of guilt. “This is just what I was talking about, with the sprained wrist? Of course I could always treat it like I was supposed to. But if I do it, how do I justify waiting all that time, and not doing it until now?”

Zappa tried to quell his annoyance, taking a deep breath and standing back up. “It’s not about what you didn’t do before, it’s about whether or not you’re trying to be better _now.”_ He gave Jian a pleading look. “Please. It’s like you said, there’s no telling how much harm he could cause. We _have_ to be fast. Can you take us to where he is now?”

Jian slowly stood up himself, looking more resigned than reassured. “...alright.”

He raised a hand and pressed his eyes shut. Zappa watched a faint trail of light lay itself out into a neat rectangle, which filled in with color and detail. The door was familiar. He almost derived some sort of comfort from the familiarity, but it didn’t last as the neat edges warped and fizzled, and the door vanished in a burst of pale smoke.

“What on earth-” Jian looked equally shocked by the failure. “My magic, where’s my magic?”

“Are you tired?” Asked Zappa. “Do you not have enough energy to do magic?”

“It’s never been hard, why is it-” Jian cut himself off, eyes suddenly growing wide and frightened. “He’s coming.”

“Huh? Doc, what do you mean?”

He stumbled on his feet again, head whipping back and forth in terror. “H-he felt me trying to teleport, it got his attention, and now he’s headed in our direction.”

Zappa felt the man’s fear sinking in as well. “Baldhead is coming?”

“Why did I do that, how could I do something so _stupid-”_

“Doctor, now’s not the time! We can either run away to try and lose him, or we can stay here and deal with him!”

Jian was paralyzed in his panic, latching onto himself and muttering so fast it became a blur. Zappa tried to keep himself calm, knowing it would be a death sentence to have them both panicking and unable to focus. He tried to draw on his magic reserves, and after a few tries managed a hemisphere of pale-pink energy that protected his top half, but nothing more. He strained, trying to force it larger, but it still only fizzled out an inch or two wider. He couldn’t focus on maintaining the barrier and trying to calm Jian down at the same time, so all he could do was listen to his manic mumbling and hope it would die down.

The woods were quiet, and if not for Jian’s incoherent chatter, it wouldn’t seem like anything was amiss. When it was finally interrupted, it wasn’t by screams or trees toppling in the distance, instead a harsh crackle of energy.

“Doctor, get down!” Zappa held up his wall to catch the bolts that fanned out in their direction. A similar line of light manifested in the air, fizzing and popping as though it were burning a chunk right out of the sky. Unlike Jian’s, it didn’t falter, and for as terrifying and loud as the racket was, it was short-lived, becoming a scratched-up door hovering in the air in a matter of seconds.

It swung open, and Baldhead tumbled out of it, briefly landing in a tangled pile before twisting himself around and propping himself up on all fours.

“Oho~? I sensed something funny and familiar, is there a doctor hiding nearby?”

Zappa felt the repressed panic hit him all at once. He somehow managed to keep a hold of his magic, but he did definitely let out a little terrified whimper behind it.

Baldhead immediately swiveled in his direction, grinning that uncomfortable grin of his. “Oh, _there_ he is! And a patient for me, how delightful! Don’t worry, I’m a good doctor! I’m more than capable of treating two patients at once!” He stood up to his full height, reaching into his coat and pulling out his long blade. “Now, who’s ready for their checkup?”

It was difficult to tell if the man’s tone was one of malice or mania, but Zappa didn’t like it either way. He knew that any display of confidence he currently had was incredibly fake-looking, but he supposed at this point it was better than nothing.

He glanced over her shoulder just slightly, too afraid to turn or look away from Baldhead for more than a second. Jian was all but a gibbering pile. “D-doctor, snap out of it! Please! You- you said you wanted to stop this, we can stop it!”

“Ahehehe, no need to worry! There’s no need to be scared!” Baldhead took a lurching step closer, and Zappa took a half-step back, bumping into Jian. “This is just a routine procedure, it won’t...hurt...a _biiiiit!”_

With a catlike shriek, the man bolted. Another grating sound joined the first as his scalpel met a wall of pink magic, not managing to cut through it but still leaving a decent-sized crack. Zappa tried to brace himself behind his damaged shield, to keep the both of them protected and to keep the force from knocking him over completely. 

Baldhead wasn’t deterred by the failure, only grinning more. “Hehe! Silly thing! There’s no need to be scared!” He said, in a tone making it very clear that he _should._

Another strike had Zappa feeling his heels dig into the dirt from the force. He held up for yet another blow, turning the crack into a spidering wound that threatened to shatter his barrier. This was going to get even worse very soon, and he knew it. Staying in place and getting hit wasn’t an option, but Jian still seemed incapable, or unwilling, to move from his spot. It was safer to run away, but fleeing by himself would leave the doctor as a sitting duck. He tried to weigh the options as more blows came down on his rapidly-weakening shield, but neither sounded like a good choice.

The sharp end of a scalpel smashed a hole clean through his wall, and he immediately panicked.

At least instinct had given him enough sense to throw the remainder of the barrier at Baldhead as it smashed to pieces and faded away, and to take advantage of the brief moment of confusion to get a head start. Mercifully, Baldhead seemed more interested in a moving target than the defenseless Jian, but that was a reassurance for all of a half-second before Zappa realized that meant all of the killer’s focus was on him alone. And Baldhead was fast- head start or not, it only took moments before he was almost in arm’s reach again.

He wasn’t skilled in much of the good offensive magics, like fire and lightning, but he did know a few party tricks. There was no chance he’d have enough energy reserved to spawn another barrier immediately, but light was easy enough, and he had no hesitation condensing a ball together and throwing it in the man’s face as a makeshift flash-bomb.

“Aaaah- Silly little thing, just sit still a moment!” Baldhead kept a vacant grin as he tried to blink away the sudden shock of light, managing a wide enough sweep with his weapon that Zappa could manage to duck out of the way. “Hahaha! This isn’t an eye test! But I’ll gladly give those a look too, while I’m at it!”

Zappa was more than aware that he was no acrobat, and the only reason he had decent reflexes was from a mix of adrenaline and the constant fear that sat in his blood- _no, no, don’t think about blood-_ but even though the dodging and the occasional blast of light kept Baldhead missing him, he never felt even remotely safe in this situation. He _needed_ Jian, he needed _something,_ there was no chance he’d be able to retaliate when all his energy was being put into dodging-

_“Ah- !”_

It took a moment for the pain to hit him, but when it did, it almost made him collapse on the spot. The scalpel swings were still awkward and wide, but a hard thrust had finally managed to hit him. A hand flew to his side, followed by his eyes. The slice didn’t look deep, but it still bled. Baldhead seemed delighted at the concept, licking his lips with fervor.

“Oh no! Look at that, see what happens when you get all squirmy? Here, let me fix it for you!”

Zappa barely managed to process the first wave of pain before the second interrupted it, in the form of Baldhead more or less tackling him to the ground. At least there weren’t any rocks to bash his head against, though there were plenty now digging into his back, and the man’s skinny frame was still horribly painful from how his knees were jamming against his ribs. And absolutely everything made the cut in his side worse- being knelt on, trying to move, trying to scream- he couldn’t tell if he really was feeling it tear further from the exertion or not.

“Aww, don’t worry, little friend!” Baldhead brought his scalpel sharp-end down, barely missing stabbing right through his captive victim’s arm in the process. Bone-thin fingers reached out to almost gingerly stroke a colorless cheek. The gentleness was momentary, as he lifted his tool back up again with a manic, face-splitting smile.

“I’ve found the issue! Your heart’s working too well! I can feel it beating so quickly, that’s not healthy! Not to worry, Just hold still for a moment so I can fix- !”

“Baldhead, this has to stop!”

The blade skidded to a halt three inches from his heart. Zappa kept his breath held, in fear that if he let it go, it would be the last one he ever took.

Jian stood across from them in the woods, looking no less disheveled than he had on the ground. “Please.” The man said quietly. “He isn’t a part of this. You know that. Let him go.”

“Hehehe!” Baldhead licked his lips, panting like a starving dog. “Why should I? I’d be abandoning a patient! That’s no good!”

“Because this is between you and me. You know that. It’s me you want.”

The blade didn’t move away, but it didn’t move any closer. The killer’s grin darkened as he continued to loom over his prey. “You’ve pulled dirty tricks on me before, why shouldn’t I do the same? Hehehe, you’re the same as always, with your collection of cute little pets. What’s wrong with this one? Chronic illness? Terminal cancer? That’s the type that always drags you in. You and your silly little codependencies. The healthy ones don’t need you anymore, do they?”

Jian was clearly insulted by the remark, but strained to keep himself from showing it. “Baldhead. Look at me. No more drawing this out. We’re going to end this, here and now.”

“Oh?” Baldhead looked positively delighted. “You can’t make a door, you can’t even manage any spells at all, can you? You have nothing to fight with. Does this mean you’ve finally realized I’m going to kill you?”

“No. Because I’m not going to fight you anymore.”

“...Ah, I see. Well, in that case,” The killer turned his attention fully back to the man under him. “Count to three, you’ll feel a little pinch!”

“No! No, Baldhead, stop it!” Jian threw his hands up, taking an involuntary step forward before forcing himself to stop. “I said I’m not going to fight you, but we’re still going to end this now.”

Baldhead’s cheery veneer cracked, as a tinge of irritation tainted it. “Don’t think you can play your dirty games again, Jian. I’m too smart for them now. I’m _not_ going to let you box me away again. I’m _sick_ of it.”

“Baldhead- Baldhead, please listen to me-” Jian pleaded, “We can’t both exist separately, it’s an information anomaly, we _have_ to-”

 _“We_ don’t have to do anything.” His mirror hissed back. “I’m the same genius you are, remember? Only one of us can make it out alive, and that’s fine with me. The only reason I haven’t already gotten through with killing you is because I want to watch you suffer, even if it’s just a tiny fragment what you put me through. First I’ll rip your little pet’s heart out right in front of you. Then I’ll do yours.”

Jian’s staggered, panicked breaths made his entire body shudder. Somehow, he managed to force a deep breath, and stand a little taller.

“No. We are ending this now, once and for all. I’m finally giving you what you want.”

“So...suicide, then?”

“No.” He said again. “I’m going to say something to you that I should have said years ago.”

Baldhead watched him with narrow eyes, clearly unconvinced. His mirror faltered under his gaze, taking a moment to brace himself. Jian gave a shuddery breath. 

“...I’m sorry.”

Everyone was silent. Zappa watched the killer’s face contort into a flurry of emotions. His mouth moved along with it, mouthing silent gibberish until a single word slipped free.

_“What?”_

“I’m sorry.” Jian repeated.

That knocked some energy back into Baldhead. He glowered at the doctor, gripping his weapon so hard it could have snapped in two. “Sorry. You’re _sorry?_ Sorry for what?! Letting me out?! What kind of ass-backward nonsense are you trying to pull- ?!”

“For ruining us both.”

There came that odd silence again. But this time, he didn’t wait for Baldhead to speak. “I was proud. Too proud. That’s how all this happened. Being a doctor always came so naturally to me. I just fit right into the role. And I wasn’t just _a_ doctor, I could master techniques in weeks that took other people years to perfect. From the start, I was a prodigy. People saw what I could do. They saw that I excelled. And they praised me for it. Even if I didn’t believe it at first, I just continued to improve and impress. That’s what people knew I could do. What they expected I could do. It was what _I_ expected I could do.

I was so convinced that I was such a skilled doctor that I could never make a mistake. That I could do anything. Like I was some kind of miracle worker. Maybe I really did earn that reputation, or maybe I listened to my own hype over and over again until I really believed it. But- but that doesn’t matter. I let my pride eat me alive. Dr. Jian, the miracle doctor, the man who could fix any malady you brought to him. That was me. That was what I was. That was _all_ I was. My identity. My purpose. The pedestal I put myself on.” 

He paused, stilling his trembling hands. “But no man can ever be perfect. I guess it’s only natural I failed eventually. But I had spent so long making ‘perfection’ who I was, my whole identity, a single failure threw me into a spiral. I was supposed to be perfect, and if I wasn’t, who was I? _What_ was I? All I could do was crumble.”

“Spare me my own origin story, _Jian.”_ Baldhead gave a venomous hiss. “You think I don’t know how it happened??”

“No. I know you do. But I’ve never been able to say it out loud. It just bubbled away in my head with all my other regrets, where you were the only one who could hear.” Jian replied, soft and sad. “I was just so… _angry_. Angry at myself, at the world, at the pieces of my ruined life. I just couldn’t handle it. So I lashed out. I broke. I told myself something must have happened. Something that wasn’t my fault. I needed to take my anger out on something, but some part of me knew I had nobody to blame but myself. I couldn’t handle both at the same time. And that’s why everything fell apart. It wasn’t when she died. It was when I couldn’t accept it. I needed something to blame, but my pride wouldn’t let me blame myself. I needed to manifest that anger, but I didn’t know what to do with it. I couldn’t direct it at anyone else, because it was my fault. But I wouldn’t let myself believe it was my fault. So I went around and around in circles until I was able to break off a part of myself. Until I had a separate ‘me’ that I could blame everything on.

I didn’t break because I was full of grief or remorse or guilt, it was because I didn’t _want_ to feel any of those, and tried to make it someone else’s fault so I wouldn’t have to. At my core, I was just a coward who didn’t want to take responsibility for my actions.”

Baldhead was at a loss for words. “You…”

“You’re right to be mad at me. I deserve every last ounce of all that vitriol you’ve been tempering for years. I just kept being that same coward over and over again, because that was the quickest, easiest way out of the situation, even though every time, all I did was run away again and again and again and pretend I wasn’t that coward that I knew I really was, deep down.

I can’t pretend anymore. The only thing that pushed us so far was pride. But that was my flaw, not yours. Blaming it all on some ‘other’ just means I was doing anything to shirk responsibility and pretend it wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t your fault, Baldhead. It never was. You weren’t evil until I forced you to be. Until I boxed you away as the epitome of my own inability to accept my mistakes. _I_ pushed you into this. ‘Baldhead’ wasn’t something that existed until I made it, and shoved all my insecurities and doubts and _hatred_ into like a kid hiding messes under the bed. It never really makes the mess go away. The only way it really ends is by acknowledging it’s there.” 

Zappa felt the weight on him finally lift away. Baldhead walked towards Jian, as though transfixed. Margherita clattered to the ground, but he paid no attention to it.

Jian was there to greet his doppelganger as he approached, reaching out to brush his cheek. “You’re a monster of my own design. That’s something I have to accept. I can’t keep running away from you, pretending like you don’t exist. I ruined you, not the other way around. I ruined _us_. You got caught up in the crossroads of my self-destruction and got turned into just the scapegoat I needed. The sacrificial lamb I tried to slaughter so I could go back to being the hero. Like it could ever be that easy. I’m...I’m so sorry.”

Baldhead leaned into his touch. Jian sighed, tears pricking his eyes.

“I could waste all my life trying to scrub out my mistakes, or I could finally move forward and try to change my future, instead of the past. I’ve spent so long at the crossroads, but I’ve never been brave enough to choose the other path. To make the harder choice. Maybe...maybe I just needed a hand to hold so I could get there.”

Two sets of spindly fingers wove together. “We’d be better together, Baldhead. My knowledge and your intuition. Your enthusiasm and my experience. Working in tandem was what made us such a skilled doctor in the first place. That’s what made us Faust. What made us _whole_. Not fighting, _cooperating._ We can’t be at war with each other. Not anymore. We can’t grow further unless we’re whole.” He took a deep breath. “I’ve spent ten years fighting you. Wondering why I could never finish the job. Why I couldn’t get rid of you once and for all. I didn’t realize it was because it wasn’t the right way. But I know now. I know what I have to do. What _we_ have to do to finally heal from this. A lifetime of healing others, it’s finally time that we heal ourself.”

Zappa felt a noise bubble in his throat as Baldhead suddenly jerked forward, but the man’s arms instead wrapped tightly around his doppelganger in a desperate embrace. After a brief hesitation, Jian mimicked the movement, squeezing them tight against each other.

Baldhead was crying. Yet despite his tears, a genuine smile crossed the man’s face.

“I’m so happy...we can be together again…”

“I missed you.” Jian said, burying his face in Baldhead’s shoulder. “I missed _us.”_

From out of nowhere, the fuzziness returned, blurring both of their figures. But rather than dark static, threads of light began to radiate off of them. An aura of magical energy surrounded the two men, first haloing their forms before swallowing them up, bit by bit, enveloping them entirely. Zappa tried to shield himself from the brightness, throwing up a hand to blot out the light.

He wasn’t sure what exactly was going on, but after a minute, the rays of light began to recede. A glow still lingered as he moved away, a smaller one, one that morphed out to take on the vague shapes of limbs and a body. When the light finally faded, there was only one man, one that Zappa recognized. 

“Doctor?”

The gash in his side had managed to clot over, and the sharp pain had become a dull throb. He managed to drag himself up and begin limping towards the figure as it slowly floated back to the ground. Feet planted firmly on the dirt, but Zappa watched as the man let out a gentle sigh and sank to his knees, wrapping arms around himself in a hug. Zappa found himself hesitating for a moment, unsure of what to expect. Still, he forced himself to move closer.

As he approached, the man looked up at him. Those eyes were so familiar, yet so different. They held kindness, warmth, and joy, but there was a tranquility to them that he couldn’t recognize. That alone threw him into further confusion, wondering if he was wrong yet again about the person he thought he was talking to after all.

“Dr Jian?” Zappa asked hesitantly. “Dr. Baldhead...?”

The man shook his head. “No. I’m Faust. I’m both. And I’m me.”


End file.
